vinylgirl's Diaryland Diary

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i wish i didn't know

It's like when you find a letter or a bill or a box that is not yours and you want to look because you are curious about what you might find. So you peek and, instant wrench in stomach. They are still together. They. Apparently they spend every wakeful minute together. Suddenly I imagine them cuddled together on his couch smirking at each other. Shake my head. Disappointment. Resentment. Loneliness. Anger. Nostalgia. It's like when you think you want the power to read people's thoughts, because you think it would ease the self-conciousness you feel, until someone reminds you that you wouldn't want to know those things. Ignorance can be blissful. It's been almost two months home and I haven't seen him. Thoughts settled.

I'll sleep it off and dream of better things.

Alli xo

10:59 p.m. - 06/25/2006

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